1st day...

I'm gonna come in here everyday the moment i reach work, or maybe when i'm awake...
I wanna keep every moment of my life writen down nicely for my love ones to see...

This is my story...
Sometimes i'm afraid i'll forget everyone in my life, really.I realized something bout me when i started having headache and i keep dozing off easily, i fear to lose my girlf, my mum and even my life...

Girlf...
Everytime i lay down next to her or when im next to her, how i wish i could tell her how much she means to me, instead of writing it down here.. im afraid i'll lose you or maybe when i sleep i'll never wake up..i wanna cuddle you to sleep, i want to sms you whole day,talk to you the whole day, watch tv the whole day, just me and you baby really... I know im not able to understand you well or even feel what you are thinking and stuff...I'm trying to understand you even when i got to guess...

Family & GOD...
I can feel that my body aren't right anymore, im really afraid and i fear...
Sometimes i ask myself, am i burden to everyone? I really wonder if im, cause i tend to make everyone around me getting worried for me all the time..There are times i dont know who i'm when i look at the mirror.. all i know is im a human being on the world..
God, there're times i wonder if you could bring me away.. i dont like to wake up suddenly with cold sweat all over me & i started crying like there's no tomorrow... i wanna be happy, i wanna stop thinking from everything...

Myself...
Im sorry for everything i did & i know there're times im a bad ass, please forgive me cause i know there's isn't a second chance in life... Im tearing badly & all i wish for was everything in my head to disappear...