The worst i could ever expect, i guess it just happen? I do whatever i can to make you smile, happy and knowing you'll always love me & maybe trust me alittle... But i guess i was wrong, it seems like the same whole thing happen over and over again... While typing, i saw your text... People who truly love you, will never shove their explanations down your throat... ha, im really a fool. Cause i know, if i dont explain now, i'll miss the chance, but you thought i shove it down your throat? ha, im really a fucking fool & i fucking swear!
I'm capable of making you cry? ha, whenever i tried to explain all you reply me was nevermind,forget it,i dont wish to talk bout it.. & when i reply you with those, you'll say my old self can never change, im always like this. I pop total of 40 pandol and im still not drowsy... Ha,im really a fool that think that having a second chance to prove everything, what happen in the past, everyone will forget but im wrong, totally...
You told me i'll never understand the fear you had, how bout me? Fearing that everything will happen all over again, you might just say you wanna break up, or the day before i meet you something happen etc... You said you're tired, you tried to trust me... I love you so much, im alrady going bonkers!
Nvm, all i know is after this post, i might be able to even write or contact anyone again... This world is better off without me right? Ha! I'm gonna pop all my medication down at one go, drink all kind of drink i can find and buy, im foolish i know cause i really cant lose you anymore. But in order for me to stop hurting you, i got to hurt myself, and i know that the only way is disappear from this world...
iloveyou always...
& if im dead, please write as depression...
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